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01/01/2014

New Year, Not So New Me


Every year I've made resolutions to be a better person, lose that extra ten pounds (*stone), eat better, yada yada yada... This year I've chosen to do something a little different.  To change nothing.

I looked back at my photos throughout the year, reflecting on the amazing people I've met through blogging and wonderful opportunities I have been given thus far. I saw somet great outfits, some shocking wardrobe choices, but as I progressed further through the year I noticed something somewhat unexpected - developing smiles.  My 2013 photos, more than anything, chart my hike in confidence.
I've never been shy, I've always been able to stand up for myself and be the loud party girl in the group so I've not needed to come out of my shell as it were.  What I did increasingly realise through blogging was that my self image and body consciousness was poor, I knew I could look 'ok' from time to time in nice clothes but I never really felt... sexy.  Womanly.  Body confident.



Just look at what a difference a year makes, I'm happy in the latter photos and certainly better looking... haha!
Through meeting so many fabulous women through blogging, I caught the infectious body positivity that they were spreading around like some kind of viral infection.  I became braver in my wardrobe choices, I experimented with colour and make up (would you believe I was too scared to wear lipstick in case I looked stupid?) and I put myself forward in fashion conversations with my slimmer counterparts at work.  These small things, which I never really realised I shied away from, have made me a completely happier person.  I've been on a catwalk and modeled for a major brand, I've reviewed clothes on requests from brands, I've been invited to some of the most amazing events and I've met the most amazing people.
I've had one hell of a year.

Yes, of course, my happiness isn't completely down to blogging and it would be a lie to say that I radiate body confidence 100% of the time.  I still have my down days, my body demons crop up, but I've learnt how to deal with them and understand it's ok that they're there - as long as they don't stick around too long (or as Becky says 'tell them politely to fuck off').
I've graduated from my HND with distinction, moved into my own home and developed so much more as a person.  I'm at a point in my life where I'm happy but still very much ambitious and eager for more... and I have the confidence to go for it now.

If you're reading this looking for New Year's resolution inspiration, then I would you advise you to think about whether you actually need to change.  Do you really need to alter yourself because of a new year?  Why is a new start only on January 1st? You can do it any time, you can be whoever you want to be, it's about being confident enough to recognise your own self worth now and what you want.
If you're reading this, thinking about whether or not you want to start blogging, like I did a year ago when reading Mrs Bebe's blog, then I urge you to do it.



I have had the most amazing year with all of you, and I would like to take this opportunity to thank you all for your readership, your engagement and your love.  I wish you all a very happy new year.


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